Doing Things Differently

This holiday season has been very different.

I remember after last year's Christmas I was just going to skip the whole thing this year and take a beach vacation with my husband. Well, unfortunately, the beach trip didn't happen, but I've still done things very differently and I've enjoyed the changes.

It started with Thanksgiving. Actually, it started with a cousin's wife getting pregnant in their first month of marriage. We had just started celebrating Thanksgiving with this side of the family at my mom's house in the last 5 or so years. As soon as I heard she was pregnant and as I remembered how she was while planning her wedding (very nice but very self-involved), I knew I wanted no part of her pregnancy.

So I decided back in the fall that I was going to give myself the gift of a pregnancy- and baby-free holiday season this year. And can you believe it? I am succeeding!

So, Thanksgiving was easy to skip because it was out of town and I couldn't travel because of my school assignments. (However, even if it was in town, I still would have skipped.)

Next was Christmas. My husband and I have been traveling every holiday season for... Well, I don't remember the last time I didn't travel to see family for Christmas. We used to alternate among the cities we all live in but that dropped off awhile ago. When I suggested celebrating in our city this year. I was told, "It is just so hard to travel with small children." To which I replied, "It's just as hard to not be able to have children and have to accommodate everyone else's lives." I was met with slightly awkward silence.

Well, honestly, I was tired. Completely wiped out, exhausted from school all semester. Plus, my beach trip wasn't happening. So I just decided we weren't going. I love my family and I definitely missed them this year, but... I have no regrets!!! :) Instead of running myself ragged, I am fully rested and perfectly content with my quiet holiday this year.

Two years ago I was going through IVF and *still* traveled during the holiday season. I was stressed and terrified and traveling with hormone injections in an ice cooler was not fun for me at all. I always regretted traveling that year. So this year felt a little like I got to balance out that experience.

The interesting thing is two years ago I would not have dreamed of skipping Christmas. In fact, my counselor at the time suggested it and I remember being mildly horrified at the idea.

How things change...

And here I am, enjoying my holiday season without any painful reminders of what my life isn't.

I highly recommend it.


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