Out Of It

I finished my semester, I'm on vacation, and I am Out. Of. It.

So tired, so exhausted, so thankful, so content, but so completely done. Happy to be on vacation.

When I first mentioned this trip idea several months ago to my husband, all I thought was I'll be done with school, it's my only break in the program, and we need to take a trip together if possible! Since MD (my abbreviation for today's "holiday") isn't ever on my mind, I didn't even realize I'd be out of town for this day.

Last year for MD, I remember that I didn't even leave the house. It was a conscious decision. I didn't feel terrible but I didn't feel comfortable, so I just enjoyed a day at home, reading on the couch and eating pizza. It was fine.

This year is awesome.

Vacation is great and I really am cultivating a life that will work for me.

It's not a complete solution. I still miss my kids. I thought coming on this vacation might make me glad I didn't have kids. They are expensive and tiring and a lot of work, haven't you heard? I am "so lucky" that I "get to travel," right? Well, it's both. It's an amazing trip, but it's not the salve that fertile people think it is.

I am having fun though. And I completely forgot today was MD. And honestly, that was nice.

I'm pretty out of it and it's a nice break. 💫



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